The Malaysian Guy Site

We are malaysian, and we are guys!

Friday, October 20, 2006

 

Wanna Play?


First of all.. we'd like to make it a point that Men In Malaysia Do Play Sports.

It's a manly thing to do. Right? You know, go out there, on the field, sweat your brains out, purposely go and drain yourself of all bodily fluids... that kind of thing.

Let's take a look at badminton shall we?

Badminto is probably one of the most tiring sports ever. It involves alot of running around, and at some points in the game, wushu-esque movements on what seems to be like a concrete floor. It's not very safe. You could accidentally land on your ankle XMAX style, and end up on World's Craziest Videos.. or something like that. So we're not gonna play badminton. But it does get the Malaysian Guys Label for Most Tiring Malaysian Sport ever.

The next game that we're taking a look at would be Sepak Takraw. (Props to people that know what it is in English) This is another one of those really tiring sports. It ALSO involves alot of wushu-esque movements on CONCRETE FLOOR. Kinda makes you consider the safety precautions when you start playing malaysian sports. This sport also tends to make a person short, with muscular legs, and small waists..(either that, or all sepak takraw players look like that). Due to the fact that we have stolen a picture that puts sepak takraw players in some serious suggestive light, this sport gets the Gayest Malaysian Sport Label from us!

An all time favourite sport in Malaysia would be football. This sport seriously takes up alot of time in a malaysian man's life.. especially when it comes to the airing of EPL, and the World Cup. There was even hype in local newspapers where the government made a statement regarding it's refusal to allow government servants to take time off to watch the world cup. wah, got like dat ah? watch football can get day off ah? can meh?? cannot!!!.

Another thing that you, dear reader, should look at would be the state of the current National Football Team.

The only words to describe it would be.... 'cannotmakeit.com' . Even Lat (a malaysian cartoonist) drew comics about them and their......plight in the world of competitive football many years ago. Let's just say that those comics are still an illustration of present day life on a football field. So Malaysian football.... gets the 'cannotmakeit.com ' label from us.

Consider these labels, pick a sport, and do what you gotta do to get buff.... and get nekkid later on!

So what are you waiting for? Go out and play!

Minum Milo anda Jadi Sihat Dan Kuat! Atau Gemuk!


Sunday, October 01, 2006

 

So You're telling Us that Love Hurts?

There are millions of teenagers in Malaysia.

80% of these teenagers are involved in relationships.

It is sad to say that 20% of these relationships lead to unneccessary drama that is unfortunately condoned by the media by their act of playing shows like The O.C and One Tree Hill on Malaysia's most popular cable network.

But if we were to look back on the parents that lived through college life during the 50's to the 70's, you could actually realise that love is so practical that there is no need for the extreme emotional rollercoaster rides to be taken in the midst of a proper boy girl relationship.

Three rules to remember while dating :

1. It is not permanent.
2. Respect one another's different family values.
3. There are many more relationships to come.

Yes, this is all so cliched. But wouldn't you think that these rules should apply in a generation that considers public displays of emotion a common thing?

Why fight in a bar and embarass yourselves? Why do it over and over again?

Why create gangster-esque fueds in academic institutions?

Why relate adolescent perversion to the true meanings of love?

Giving a blow job isn't an act of promising a future today.

Asking for one and receiving it without an ounce of guilt is pure chauvinism.


Kudos to those that maintain the decency and dignity of a relationship. You can't get any more mature than that.

To those that are single, take this as a lesson and apply it in future relationships.

To those that would readily admit to being involved in the real life versions of these case scenarios, it's time to re-evaluate yourselves, and please remember to cause a little less drama in the future.


'bagaikan babak dalam cerita 'The O.C'

Monday, September 18, 2006

 

Since when did ZOMG become the new OMG?


Seriously man.

This pop culture is bringing alot of ridiculous fads and ideas into the minds of brainless youngsters.

All those little acronyms are a little bit too juvenile for us..... men.

But considering the fact that we're very nice, and adventurous... we'll just give it a shot. And just see if it makes us 'feel young once more'.




ZOMG! WE SO TOTALLY HEART XIAXUE! XOXOXO.

Boys. This is another reason to leave home for 'higher-ing education'. Study in Singapore if you ever dream of meeting her on the street (euphamism for stalking .. just kidding). Seriously man. She might seem a little bit obnoxious on her blog. But you know, a girl that speaks her mind is better than those that don't. A relationship can be a learning process too. We're very sure that we'd probably learn alot from this one. Oh yea.. and her leopard skin bracelet is pretty !

Miss Xia Xue, if you're reading this, would you please date us? We wanna bring you for some top grade foie gras. We'll even buy you tons of goose liver.

That's one try of the use of new words on the 'internets'. This is how we're gonna use the next one.

STFU! It's 'scene' to be Kenny Sia. Cuz we HEART Amber Chia. And he took a picture with her. (fine, not much use of it here.. WE DON'T USE THESE WORDS DAMNIT!)

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

look at who kenny's standing next to. We view in much envy...

After reading this post. You're probably saying things like 'No, we don't talk like that online' and all that bla-bla-ness that you may come up with. You're right if you think so too. When we said 'minds of brainless youngsters', we weren't talking about malaysian youngsters. We're actually talking about youngsters in that country with the flag almost the same colours as us, same pattern, but got many stars on it.

*grin*


And if you are a Malaysian youngster using these words. Don't be an idiot. That's the last piece of cultural influence that you'd ever need from them. Idiot!


ROFL! LMAO! TTYL!

Saturday, September 16, 2006

 

So, What Now?

Ok. Lets go through a little check list that we've made...

orgasm - check
fake orgasm - check
hot chicks singing bad songs - check

There's seriously alot of feminine content in this blog don't you agree? What about something a little bit more manly?

Crocodile Hunter!!

Meh.. he died last week. Last weeks news.

What's current today with malaysian guys?

What problems do we suffer from?

Ooh! Ooh!! Ever lost a chick to a white dude?!?!?!?!?

Ok, maybe not. people's lives cannot seriously be that tragic....

Um.... ok. We'll call it 'testing an urban legend'.

So have a look. Why Asian guys can't get white girls . . . .


yeh, betcha never thought about this eh? Eh? Eh?!?!

Consider the intense-ness of the issue.

Quote of the semester - "Furries!"


Thursday, September 14, 2006

 

Why P.Diddy, Why?

Disclaimer: This post is in no way intended to diss P.Diddy. We're just asking questions. We still respect you, and hope that we would one day attend your yatch parties.


Ok la, so one day, the malaysian hunks were hanging out in front of our very big/very macho/very chun 52 inch projection tv.

then all of a sudden, this Danity Kane video comes out.

We're all like 'yo, p.diddy's new chick group'.

Albeit the fact that the amoi's in this band are damn hoochie, we gotta say that the song - is just...unnappealing to the ears of us.

We're wondering why p.diddy would allow this piece of musical mishap to stream into the mainstream sounds of music. he did look pretty cuckoo on the show, but hell man.. he's better than this.

Remember the sounds of Dream (his other girl band), and Usher? Those were pretty awesome to chill with.. (and one of us used to dance to Dream in the shower.. HAR HAR.)

So lets all put our heads together, and just think of why P.Diddy, the super hit producer, would let this "song" hit the airwaves.

Take at the look at this mismatched choreography in this video.


Biscuits!


Wednesday, September 06, 2006

 

L.O.V.E

Not the stupid Ashlee Simpson song ok?!?? That song is not "interegesting" enough for us to blog about. You Think We're Crazy?

Ok, malaysian boys are... probably obliged to fall in love with malaysian girls.

some say that falling in love in ones own hometown is probably the best thing to do.

some say that you can fall in love, but you can't touch.


Asian cultures do confuse us teenage creatures.

We're on the edge of our adolescence, and we don't know who to fall in love with.


But we definitely have fallen in love with this one!


*drum rolls*

The Malaysian Guys site official sexiest-girl-in-miri award goes to... non other than this pretty young specimen of the female species, ing hui, or blogger mamoyo .

We sometimes like our girls to be...."amoi". We sometimes like our girls to be......"ah lien". Some of us don't even like girls ok? And the rest like their girls to be....."down right chio and cool at the same time man!"

WE.... love the whole chio + cool combination . some how chicks like these seem a little bit more comfortable with their thoughts and true selves.

So to all the hoochie momma's out there wanting to chill with us malaysian guys.. show some guts, and go out there and make your own version of the mamoyo fake orgasm video.



"We're losers, but we're cool!" - The Malaysian Hunks, 2006

Saturday, September 02, 2006

 

Hello Smello from the malaysian guys!

Ok, So new blog, and I'm sure that most of you are expecting some sort of well written introduction regarding non other than - us.

Hyped up?

We'll do that later when we actually get off our lazy asses and start thinking of something Smart. And abit less retarded than we really are.

To officially open this blog, we'd like to put up something extraordinary. Some of you pervy minded guys might have seen this, but nevertheless, we're putting it up. For the pleasure of our other testosterone driven peers who have so far been deprived of this ridiculously entertaining video!

Thanks to Howard Stern and the advent of Youtube, the typical sorrority male is now allowed to view beautiful women in their pre-orgasmic state.

This here, gentlemen, is the Sybian.
It appears to be some kind of chair that has the special ability to satisfy a woman's sexual needs.

Lets just hope that these things don't go commercial in our areas, or else we'd be left to rot on weekend nights, while our women, literally enjoy the furniture.

But as we wait our possible impending doom, lets take a look at famous pornstar Jenna Jameson take a ride on this innovatively invented piece of furniture.

Here's a tip : Turn up your speakers real loud. Especially if you're sitting in the living room.

Howard Stern : Now tell me, Are you Feeling Orgasmic?

We folks at the Malaysian Guy site hope you enjoyed the first post! Happy Wanking!


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